I just found this site where you can find out the rating of your blog (R, Pg-13 or G). I decided to test it out and got this:
Haha!! And how did I get the rating? According to the site, I wrote (well at least on the first page of this blog):
ROFL!! OK~ 🙄 What can I say..I guess that’s how I talk and it makes me laugh that the test gave me a R Rating for words like ‘Shit’ and ‘Crap‘. Yeah, those words are inappropriate, I agree but it’s not bad as ‘F***‘. See, I always censor the F word in my blog. I know some people don’t apply any type of levels for these words and for them Shit and F*** are treated equally (as in “they’re all bad words, not one is more worse than the other!”).
You know what, I want to talk about offensive/inappropriate language. Not going to be a balanced essay type of thing showcasing the bright side and downside of such language. No no no, screw that! If you want to read those type of stuff, you can find it elsewhere. This is just my random thoughts on personal experience with using this type of language.
Click more for the rest of the post. Some people might not want to read stuff filled with swear words so I hid it. At least it’s not password protected (Pfft~ password protected post~ I hate those things. Why bother posting if you don’t want to share it).
Now where should I start? Aha! The Seven words popularized by notorious comedian George Carlin. When I was initially toying with several ideas for this post, it was the same day when I found out that George Carlin died. Wow! That was weird, I was just thinking about him and that “Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television“. Anyway, RIP George Carlin and I wasn’t actually really familiar with his work beside the “Seven Words” (now I’m pretty much familiar with his work though after watching several YouTube Videos later LOL). So let’s start with that, the infamous Seven Words You Can Never Say on TV (at least on American broadcast TV networks). These are:
Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker and Tits
I rarely use Cunt and Cocksucker for some reason and maybe because I’m not used to it, I think. Tits….yeah…but I use the word boobies more often. Besides, what’s wrong with the word tits anyway. It may not be a polite word but it’s not that bad. I say that it’s just an informal word. That leaves us with Shit, Piss, Fuck and Motherfucker. Oh yeah, these words are part of my vocabulary. Ofcourse I use these words only when I talk to my friends, i mean, you gotta know your limit, right. But enough about how I’m supposed to talk and on to how I really talk when I’m around someone I feel safe to use these words. Shit, Piss, Fuck, asshole, son a bitch, dickhead, Motherfucka!!
I remember when I first saw the movie Superbad, I was thinking ‘WTF?! Ok, this is kinda stupid and over the top. These kids do nothing but having conversation about stuff like imagining girls having dicks and about how boring to see a pussy without a cock shoved into it. And they say Fuck too much, man, this is kinda stupid!” Then I thought about our language and the stupid conversation we used to have at the canteen table back when I was in High School, that’s when I realize “man, we fucking swear a lot“. I’m complaining about these two kids in Superbad talking about Cocks and yet we used to talk and make a lot of jokes involving dicks.
One funny stupid Canteen table dick joke that I remember started with one of my friends who was trying to figure out which instruments he wants to play for his solo performance in music class. Then one of us, forgot who, said that he should just jack off in front of the audience and then things just snowballed after that when each of added stuff to the joke. It ended up with a joke about jacking off to the tune of Blue Danube and finishing off with cumshots to the audience’s gaping mouth in a spectacular display of bukake-like musical grand finale. And we imagined it in slow motion too. We laughed our ass off but not because of the joke itself but mostly because of how the fuck we could come up with that shit.
Thinking back, I kinda feel sorry for this quiet chinese girl who was the only girl who sat at our table. She had to put up with our stupid jokes almost everyday. I had a joke about how someday she would lose it and suddenly explode with Fuck Bombs. Actually she did say the F word few times if I remember corrrectly. But she said in a ‘whispery’ way like “then she did’t give me a single thing, like what the *lowers voice to whisper-like level* fuck~”
The word fuck was used a lot and mostly for the purpose of emphasizing something eg.’fucking hilarious!’ ‘fucked idiot!’. Yet we don’t try to overuse it then you’re just trying to make a fool out of yourself. I remember my friend and I, high schoolers back then, went to the middle school building after school for some reason I can’t remember (picking up some stuff for some event I think, who cares doesn’t matter). So we saw these middle school kids, these skater type kids with long hairs covering half of their eyes (seriously, how can they fucking see!!) and one guy said something like this to his friend:
Dude, fuck man, you should’ve been fucking there, man. Like, you know, Josh, man, fucking Josh got fucked by his fucking teacher coz he’s like, you know, fucked his fucking homework and his fucking teacher got really fucking pissed off at him and he was like, fucking yelling at his fucking face! Like what the fuck! Josh is like in Fucking trouble, man. In deep shit, Deep fucking shit! That fucking teacher should get his fucking ass fired or something. Fuck!
Ok, maybe that wasn’t exactly what he said but you get my point. The kid was cramming the word ‘fuck’ in every sentence and it was fucking hilarious! We couldn’t help but laughed so hard. Good thing there weren’t any teachers in the hallway that time and they’ll be “like in deep fucking shit, man!” Which reminds me of the time when my english teacher’s eyes bulged when I blurted out the phrase “pissed off” during a class dicussion. I was referring to a character in All My Sons (I think it was the part where the son found out that his dad was guilty of the plane accident or something like that and so he got ‘pissed off’. Can’t remember the plot in detail). I remember putting the word ‘Shit’ in a story I wrote for homework. I felt that it was justified because the word was said by this tough no nonsense character (he ran out of bullets in the middle of a fight against an alien monster so he said “Oh Shit!!”). My teacher couldn’t be bothered anyway but then I gave it to the school magazine and word was changed into “blasted!” 🙄 Blasted?!! BLASTED?!! Shit to Blasted!!! Haha the badass character suddenly lost his edge.
Let’s end this post with my favourite dirty joke
There was a Queen who had a large pussy and she would give a lot of money to anyone who can give her an orgasm.
Then came three guys: a Black guy, a French guy and a Chinese. The black guy has a large dick and tried his best to satisfy the Queen. After a half hour of sex, the queen was bored and fell asleep.
It’s the French guy’s turn to satisfy the Queen and he failed too after an hour of sex with her. Despite his bigger dick, the Queen fell asleep anyway.
It’s the Asian guy’s turn and both the black and french guy laughed their asses off. They say it’s impossible for the Asian guy to satisfy the queen because his dick is small. The Asian guy went for it anyway and surprisingly the Queen moaned after reaching orgasm in just a matter of minutes!!!
The black guy and the French guy asked how he did it. The Asian guy said, “Wah, so easy lah! You use your HEAD ah!”
And I first heard that joke from a girl Hahaha
I’ll leave you with this hilarious ‘educational’ video that most of you have probably seen. Enjoy and then go Fuck yourself! 🙂
PS: I decided to test this post and I got this: