Heroes don’t die… They just reload PART DOS!

UPDATED 3/07/08 From now on, I will continually update this post as more information comes in. 

UPDATED 9/03/08   I’ve added Jean Claude Van Damme. I can’t believe I forgot about him in the first place.

Click here for Part Uno

Previously we checked out how our old action heroes did with their attempt in reviving their famous franchise. This time I would suggest which action heroes should revive their franchise.

Eddie Murphy – Axel Foley

Axel Foley Eddie Murphy

First release: Beverly Hills Cop (1984)
Last release: Beverly Hills Cop III (1994)

Highlights: A reckless Detroit cop busting some ass in Beverly Hills with a crappy blue Chevy; stop bad guys by putting a banana on their car’s tailpipe (genius); signature Eddie Murphy laugh; that funky theme song

Why it needs to be made?
Remember when Eddie was funny? Nowadays he’s doing shit like Haunted Mansion, Pluto Nash and Daddy DayCare. He did make a comeback with his Oscar nominated role in Dreamgirls but then he makes shit again with Norbit. Come on Eddie!

Status (3/07/08)
A script is in work!!

Brett Ratner (Rush Hour Trilogy, Xmen3) will direct. According to MTV Movie blog he said:

“10-year-old kids, 12-year-old kids don’t really know the old ‘Beverly Hills Cop.’ So it’s an opportunity to make it new for kids,” Ratner said. “The same way it felt for me watching ‘Beverly Hills Cop’ when I was a kid, that’s what I want to do for kids today.”

BHC4 for kids??? PG13?? No wait, he said this afterwards over at Latinoreview

“Dont believe everything you read on the internet. Believe me, this is going to be a hard core ‘R’ Beverly Hills Cop. I start shooting next year”

As for Eddie, he has this to say regarding the fourth movie over at MTV Movies Blog:

“Because the third ‘Beverly Hills Cop’ was horrible!” the once and future Detective Axel Foley laughed. “I didn’t want to leave it like that. The first two were cool and the third one was sh—y. [Let’s] get the franchise fixed again, clean up this old mess and do a good movie.

“[Don’t] just leave Axel with his thumb up his a– from the last movie,” the comic continued, chuckling. “Whatever happened to Axel Foley? He’s sitting in Detroit with his thumb up his a– since ‘Beverly Hills Cop III.’ Let’s take those thumbs out and make a great movie!”


Kurt Russell – Snake Plissken

Snake Plissken Death Proof

First release: Escape from New York (1981)
Last release: Escape from LA (1996)

Highlights: Saves a jackass President from Manhattan-turned-mega-maximum-security-prison only to later make him foolish at the end of the movie (the epitome of anti-hero, not taking any sides); “switching off” the earth, cool eye patch; NO SNAKE PLISSKEN = NO METAL GEAR SOLID

Why it needs to be made?
The right atmosphere. With all the stuff about Iraq War, patriot act, terrorism nowadays I think we need another Escape From installment.

As for Kurt Russell, he’s been doing movies like Miracles, Dreamers and Sky High which was cool to see how Kurt has changed. But then came Grindhouse/Death Proof and wow he can still be a badass.

Then there’s the troubled remake of Escape from New York. Gerard Butler (300) was attached to star but dropped out due to creative difference. Stop with the remake and just make a sequel. Kurt can still do it. And I saw Escape From New York again recently on TV. It’s still cool.

Status (3/07/08)
A remake of the original is in work but no news on a sequel. Gerard Butler dropped out of the project and it is rumored that Josh Brolin (a much better choice I think) is up for the role.

NOTE: The original idea for the second sequel was called Escape From Earth.

Jean-Claude Van Damme – Luc Devereux

Luc Devereux JCVD

First release: Universal Soldier (1992)
Last release: Universal Soldier: The Return (1999) 

Highlights: Dead Vietnam war soldier turned super soldier; fights Dolph Lundgren, Bill Godlberg and Michael Jae White; those deadly Van Damme kicks

Why it needs to be made?
There is a new Van Damme movie called JCVD which is a semi-biographical movie starring Jean Claude Van Damme as JEAN CLAUDE VAN DAMME! This could be a fun movie and maybe his comeback. Now if only he could follow that up with a R rated action packed summer theatrical release of Universal Soldier 3.  

Status (3/07/08)
Rumor about a new installment of Universal Soldier starring Jean Claude Van Damme and possibly Dolph Lundgren.

NOTE: There were two direct to video sequels called Universal Soldier II: Brothers in Arms & Universal Soldier III: Unfinished Business but Van Damme wasn’t in those two movies.

Steven Seagal – Casey Ryback

Steven Seagal Steven Seagal Guitar

First release: Under Siege (1992)
Last release: Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (1995)

Highlights: An ex Navy SEALS chef stop terrorist aboard a US navy ship with the help from a Playboy Playmate, stop terrorist aboard a train with the help from young Katherine Heigl, So much ass kicking

Why it needs to be made?
I just want to see Steven Seagal kicking ass on the big screen again not straight to video. Show these young kids how to really kick ass. And my mom is a big fan of Steven Seagal too. I want the new Under Siege to be set in an airplane. Why?

  1. Snakes on the Plane & Flight of the living dead – Planes are now a trend for cult moviegoers
  2. Planes are now an “in thing” for wannabe terrorists. So all we need is Seagal to kick their ass in a plane
  3.  Steven Seagal did not even made it on the plane in Executive Decision. Redeem it!

Rumor about Under Siege 3

Note: Check this out! Oh and even though Under Siege is the only successful Steven Seagal franchise, Nico Toscani from his first movie, Above the Law is my favourite Steven Seagal character. 

Chuck Norris – Scott McCoy

Chuck Norris Guns Chuck Norris

First release: Delta Force (1986)
Last release: Delta Force 2: The Colombian Connection (1990)

Highlights: Teams up with the late Lee Marvin against terrorist who are hijacking a plane, blows up a guy with a rocket that shoots out of his motorcycle, fought a war against drugs his way

Why it needs to be made?
It’s Chuck Norris!!! The theme of Delta Force is still relevant today. Sure, they can tone down the American propaganda a bit with the new movie.

Not gonna happen LOL

Note: I just found out that there was Delta Force 3 but Chuck Norris wasn’t in it therefore I pretend that movie didn’t exist. Another famous character played by Chuck Norris is Col. James Braddock of the MIssing In Action Trilogy. Why it’s not included here is because I prefer Delta Force than MIA series. Besides,  the main theme of the MIA series wouldn’t be relevant today because it was unique for its era (Vietnam was the hot topic). Of course you can say the same thing about Rambo hence why some only love the first two Rambo movies. But hey, I love Rambo more than Chuck Norris so Rambo being in Afghansitan and Burma doesn’t bother me at all 🙂

Badass scene from Delta Force.


4 thoughts on “Heroes don’t die… They just reload PART DOS!

  1. Pingback: 10,000…not the damn movie, my view count « Trylobyte’s Corner

  2. Pingback: Heroes don’t die… They just reload « Trylobyte’s Corner

  3. Pingback: The Expendables « Trylobyte’s Corner

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